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Healing The Wound of Betrayal

By:Amber Agha
Date: Fri,22 Mar 2013
Submitter:Amber Agha
Views:5297

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Betrayal. How do we heal the wounds of Betrayal? How to convince a heart and a mind that it is safe to trust again, to surrender, to let go?

Betrayal can take many forms and happen in many ways from of oneself, to from someone we love, to those we look up to and respect. From family to friends, to lovers, to colleagues, to feeling it at the hands of the world.

What has remained a constant for me in countless times of feeling betrayed is the knowledge that at no time was I Betrayed by Mother Father God. At no time was I betrayed by Spirit. Despite feeling like I may have been. In the end I saw that that Love was there for me continuosly and was not dependant on anything other me being open to receiving it. And so that is the way back from the effects of Betrayal. We ask Spirit to heal us, we ask to fall into the arms of Spirit and of that Endless source of Love and in that we wash ourselves free of the pain and resentments of Betrayal.

It also helps to understand that when we feel we have been betrayed by another, it is very often because that person is unable to offer us what we need or are looking for. They may be unable to be naked in their Truth, they may lack the skills to be discreet in secrets shared. And what we share with someone is then their property- so it requires a mindfulness of who we share our Souls with.

They may lack the space in their hearts or in themselves to hold the space for someone else. They will most certainly be on their own journey, and this may mean they are in a place where they are unable to be what we need them to be. And this extends to the most heinous of betrayals- abuse of power in any form to betrayal of lies told, truth witheld, confidences betrayed. That person is unable. Someone once likened this state to us wanting a man in a wheelchair to get up and walk. We are asking the impossible of someone. It is not where they are- right now. For all is Change. This does not justify the behaviour- what it asks of us is to see the struggling human in them. Is to see the Soul on a journey and that above all none of this was personal to us. We did not do something “wrong”- for we are all linked and oftentimes the stories of others shall collide with ours.

Personally the times in my life when I have been betrayed what has hurt me the most is that all along I knew. Is that all along, I had received guidance from Spirit, from my inner knowing that this person was not to be trusted, that this situation was not as it was appearing to be. I knew. And the biggest betrayal was of Self. That I refused to listen to that inner knowing.And in fact did so time and again.

For Spirit shall guide us, should we choose to allow ourselves to get so close to the whisperings of Spirit. Should we look back on events and occasions of betrayal most of the time we shall be able to say- we had a feeling, we had a sense, we were not sure and yet we did not listen.

And so the biggest healing comes when we forgive ourselves for betraying ourselves in those moments. And from that we see the trail of this pattern. How many times have we betrayed ourselves? How many times have we dishonoured ourselves. Not listening to the small voice that says I dont want to do that, I dont feel comfortable with that person, I dont like how this makes me feel. How many times have we silenced that voice as being silly, as making a fuss, as being nonsense to be controlled. How many times? And how long shall we continue doing that?

The time now is to honour what we are feeling and what those feelings are telling us. Yes we do need to be mindful also. Sometimes that voice will be over protective. At some stage something may have happened to make that part of us now fear or be reticent of all that is out of the comfort zone. And so yes we need a balance of the heart and mind. And in those moments to gain clarity we go to Spirit. We sit in silence, we sit or walk in nature and we pray and ask for Spirit to show us the Truth of a situation. And if still unclear, if still unsure, stillness shall prove effective. For all is movement and all comes to pass in time- all unravels for us to see the whole picture- given time. And we know what is meant for us shall return, shall remain. We know this. And this shall assist us in tempering that drive to push forwards all the time and control. This shall allow us to have the patience to allow life to equally unfold and be created.

Betrayal runs in all of us. Our history is steeped with it. And when we have betrayed another- then we too shall need to contend with guilt and the seeking of Forgiveness. At the end of each day a good practice is to wipe the slate clean. To go through every event where one may have hurt another and ask forgiveness in prayer from Mother Father God, from Self and from that person. And of course if it is possible to ask forgiveness straight away from any betrayal one may have been party to. We know when we have betrayed another and better to ask for forgiveness and start the healing right away than let it fester.

Those who betray, those who reveal confidences, those who let another down, those who abuse positions of power and responsibility, those who conceal the Truth are betraying the God part of themselves every time. They are silencing that still small voice in them which will also be screaming this does not feel right. If continued for years this part may fall silent, this gateway to the Divine may close. So they provide the biggest mirror to us as a Whole, of what happens when we stop listening to Guidance. When we stop honouring the Truth- of what we become.When we disconnect from the Divine in Us.

And if one has been betrayed? Then the prayers are to ask for help in forgiving those who have perpetrated this. And to ask for the bigger learning to be made clear. To forgive self. And to check in- how does this affect my relationship with Spirit? Am I feeling somehow this is down to Spirit and I feel let down by Spirit? In which case that is a conversation – for such it is to have in your quiet times. Your relationship with Spirit, with Mother Father God, with the Great Unseen is what shall hold you strong in times of disappointment in this Earthly Realm and so that is the Union to feed daily so it shall feed you also.

So as we grow to honour our Selves, as we grow to see that we are the reflection of The Great Spirit and so we too are Sacred. That our feelings and intuitions are the God part of us guiding us- so then we shall start the process of Self Respect. And in that the next time we have a feeling, an intuition we shall listen, we shall see where that listening takes us. And as Man learns to betray himself less and less he shall be better placed to betray others less.

And so the Union with All deepens. For All is One.

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Comments

Jay said:

But first you would have to understand God
Sat,20 Apr 2013,10:07:47 GMT

Amber said:

I dont believe in pigeon holing what are very human emotions- betrayal comes from a place of wounded- ness often and its okay to have that feeling. Rather than tell it off and call it "ego" we embrace it and ask that feeling what do you need to feel loved and healed. We are human- we are not Gods and its important we have compassion with ourselves. We can sometimes set such hard goals for us to reach that we end up punishing ourselves or reprimanding ourselves for very human emotions.
The key for me is to be human and to forgive as a God. To Love as a God.
Fri,19 Apr 2013,23:43:56 GMT

Eric said:

Is it the Ego that feels betrayal? If you/I were fully enlightened would we feel betrayal?
Would or should we not feel compassion and understanding towards where the feeling came from? Hope you understand what I am trying to say.
Fri,29 Mar 2013,08:58:09 GMT
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